I want to be okay

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277k ratings

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna

This is the blog I use to vent and to not feel alone in this shit.

So please don’t report, you can always just block me.

I know that what I post can be triggering, this includes, but is not limited to the following topics:

Depression

ED/disordered eating

Self harm

Suicidal thoughts

Gender dysphoria

Tourettes syndrome

I try to tag as much as I can, but it might happen that I forget to tag triggers.

DNI if you don’t have an ED, are trans-/homophobic, racist, ableist etc

(I will block you, but if your blog doesn’t show that you have an ED you can DM me so I know)

I know that what I’m doing isn’t healthy and that it’s dangerous, but I am not ready to recover yet.

IF IT IS POSSIBLE FOR YOU PLEASE CHOOSE RECOVERY AND GET HELP!!!!

Edit: I will give recovery another try, this time with professional help in an outpatient clinic.

Edit2: I’m relapsing again…

Edit3: I’m trying to recover once again, but this time slower than the last times

Edit4: still trying to recover, but had a few minor setbacks/relapses since the last edit

Edit5: guess I’m back at my bullshit once again lol

Edit6: recovery attempt nr. idk. Let’s see how long this will last lol

Edit7: after about 3 1/3 months I’m back on my bullshit :)

Edit8: well, those two weeks were “fun”… Let’s see if I can get better for longer xD

Edit9: 2 ½ months and I’m back lol

Edit10: my two weeks are over again, guess I’ll try to actually recover .-.

Edit11: so I’m throwing away 4 months and 25 days. Again. Guess I’ll never get rid of this .-.

Edit12: almost a fucking month and definitely the worst episode I had so far… I just hope I won’t be back for Christmas lol

Pinned Post pretty boy 13
defiantlydelta
defiantlydelta

normalise disabled eyes. normalise crossed eyes, normalise lazy eyes, normalise nystagmus, normalise how disabled eyes look and move. stop being shitty to vision impaired people and others with eye conditions about our fucking eyes. our eyes tell you fuck all about how "smart" we are (stop being intellectually ableist anyway), they don't tell you if we're listening, they just tell you that we have an eye condition.

jukain4216

Also want to add astigmatism to the list because for some people their astigmatism may force them to stare in a way that I've seen people mock

defiantlydelta

yes! everyone please add other conditions! there are so many eye conditions and i barely know my own, lmao. normalise ALL disabled eyes.

defiantlydelta

#my optometrist has been commenting on my head tilt for years - it's apparently sometimes a way to correct for vision issuesALT

@zyrafowe-sny omg so THAT'S why my head's not straight?? omg my eye doctors always commented on it too but never told me it was actually a compensation or whatever. they were just like "you do this thing" and i never made the connection (and tbh i still don't understand the connection). i tilt my head to the side of my bad eye

defiantlydelta
defiantlydelta

i hate how many trans people are trying to do a "man/woman refer to gender and male/female refer to sex" because, like...

people constantly use male and female for gender and people constantly use man and woman for sex, because the vast majority of perisex cis people doesn't know the difference.

i mean, i literally got invited to a cervical screening recently where they called everyone with a cervix women, clearly using the word "woman" to describe a single sex characteristic.

on the other hand, i constantly have to fill out things that ask me to put down my gender as either male or female.

there's literally no difference in how these terms are used except that one is a noun and one is an adjective.

it's especially fucked up to see other trans people do this because it just sounds like they want me to be ok with being called female, despite it being misgendering.

but their argument makes it sound like it's not actually misgendering because "actually it's referring to sex".

like, we literally went through that "male-bodied" and "female-bodied" misgendering bullshit. why are you trying to bring it back.

and every time someone says this, people are always like "but trans women don't want to be called male and vice versa", somehow forgetting that maybe nonbinary people don't want to be misgendered either.

and the people making that crappy point in the first place always end up saying "but they're not male or female because of HRT/surgery!" basically implying that it's totally okay to misgender non-medically-transitioned people as male or female.

respectfully, shut the fuck up forever. trans women can call themselves female as much as they want, no matter what transition steps they've done. trans men can call themselves male as much as they want, no matter what transition steps they've done.

and trans and nonbinary people have the right to not be misgendered in alignment with their AGAB.

no matter how much mental gymnastics you try to do, i'll never be female again, and calling me female will never not be misgendering.

the-haiku-bot
ladyshinga

“Oh [other profession] wants better working conditions? WELL [MY profession] is HARDER I work TWENTY HOUR DAYS and I am NOT ALLOWED BREAKS and I’m PAID FOR SHIT and I have NO INSURANCE and I NEVER SEE MY CHILDREN so WHY are YOU COMPLAINING LOL”

have you considered that maybe YOUR job ALSO should not suck that much

the-haiku-bot

have you considered

that maybe YOUR job ALSO

should not suck that much

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.